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Crunchy politics

Emmet O'Brien has commended to my attention the Yasser Arafat cheese-flavored corn chips now being sold in Egypt: Shopkeepers say...

Crunchy politics -- comment #1 from Scott Janssens

Fri, 31 May 2002 15:51:13 -0500

I don't think you can make stuff like that up :)

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Posted May 31, 2002 3:51 PM by Scott Janssens

Crunchy politics -- comment #2 from John M. Ford

Fri, 31 May 2002 17:34:16 -0500

Well, you -can- make up stuff like that -- after all, I doubt that the finger of Allah wrote, "Mene Tekel Cheese-Flavored Arafat" -- you just don't generally want to, because it loads the disbelief suspenders to a degree that a Cirque du Soleil performer would find excessively risky.

The corresponding American product that comes to mind is Ken Lay's Potato Chips -- Eat the Evidence!
Or, from seveal completely different angles, Ashcrofts(tm) Hemorrhoidal Wipes -- They Give Neither Aid Nor Comfort.

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Posted May 31, 2002 5:34 PM by John M. Ford

Crunchy politics -- comment #3 from Teresa Nielsen Hayden

Fri, 31 May 2002 19:02:22 -0500

Many, many tickle a parson, and you and Neil and Ken MacLeod invent cool stuff all the time. So do other writers, of course; but you three are notable cases.

I can't think up any American products to give you in return. My inventive mind runs more upon subjects like the usefulness of near-vacuum, and why I wish I had access to it when I'm cooking. (I also have an idea for a thing that'll store and dispense spare bogrolls without using any floor or shelf space; I may yet build it.) So I'm not uninventive -- but jokes? Don't hold your breath. I wish I could devise them. They're an irresistible force.

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Posted May 31, 2002 7:02 PM by Teresa Nielsen Hayden

Crunchy politics -- comment #4 from Avram

Sat, 01 Jun 2002 03:45:47 -0500

I don't even know what a bogroll is. The word looks like something I might find in the D&D Monster Manual.

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Posted June 1, 2002 3:45 AM by Avram

Crunchy politics -- comment #5 from Beavis Webber

Sat, 01 Jun 2002 09:50:17 -0500

"Bogroll" == "T.P. for my BUNGhole!"

Heh-heh! Heh-heh! Heh-heh!

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Posted June 1, 2002 9:50 AM by Beavis Webber

Crunchy politics -- comment #6 from Charlie Stross

Sat, 01 Jun 2002 16:19:50 -0500

What *REALLY* freaked me the other day was passing an off-license (ObUS usage: liquor
store) with a window display extolling the cheapness and virtue of Victory Gin.

Big Brother Blair must be spinning in his grave fast enough you could hook him up to the national grid by now.

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Posted June 1, 2002 4:19 PM by Charlie Stross

Crunchy politics -- comment #7 from Teresa Nielsen Hayden

Sat, 01 Jun 2002 22:08:37 -0500

If you had the true Beavis-nature, you'd know there's a high-end brand of German tracing and drafting paper named "Bumwad".

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Posted June 1, 2002 10:08 PM by Teresa Nielsen Hayden

Crunchy politics -- comment #8 from Bob Webber

Sun, 02 Jun 2002 11:15:38 -0500

I did in fact know about Bumwad (or at least I think I did, the factoid rang a bell) but in confirming that you weren't just having me on, I discovered what I had not known: you can buy Bumwad in rolls.

At this point, I can barely type, and the tears are making it hard to focus on the screen.

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Posted June 2, 2002 11:15 AM by Bob Webber

Crunchy politics -- comment #9 from John M. Ford

Mon, 03 Jun 2002 17:20:08 -0500

Dept. of Expired Horses:

Condolezza Rice krispies
We have Snap and Crackle, and are Optimistic About Achieving Pop in the Near Future.

Heimatschuzes(tm) Potato Chips
With Ridges, For . . . I Forget What.

Ari Fleischedig
When You Know Something's Not Kosher.

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Posted June 3, 2002 5:20 PM by John M. Ford

Crunchy politics -- comment #10 from Bob Webber

Wed, 05 Jun 2002 12:32:11 -0500

I liked theCondoleez Rice Krispies, in particular. For some reason, all I can come up with on my own behalf is Richard Milhouse Nixon Wax Lips.

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Posted June 5, 2002 12:32 PM by Bob Webber