Still, I am sorry that poor reader has been denied the blessings of traditional Mormon cooking.

I'll have to whip up a batch of those for our next potluck.

I would vote for someone who writes a sex blog flaming Teresa on reading comprehension, but inexplicably it wasn’t one of the choices.

How about a sex blog doing mormon food reporting?

Just when I thought I'd seen everything in the imply/infer wars. I want to print that out and stick it up on my corkboard, for when I need a good giggle.

I'll cop to the humor value of doing Mormon food reporting; after all, that's why I linked to Theresa in the first place, because the subject was funny.

(So what would be the connotation of "recline," in this sense? An assertion that submits to someone else's inference? Repeating an implication word-for-word after it's already been called into question? Such possibilities...)

sigh.

Long day?

If you like, I'll lend you the towel I'm using to wipe the egg off my own face. I did, after all, manage to drop an "s" from "dessert" in a post where I maligned someone's spelling. Doh!

(Hangs head in shame as cheeks rapidly turn a nice shade of Hot Tamale)

Oh, the fun part was sitting with my grandmother and cutting the vegetables into diamonds.

California Episcopal, that's me. We have my grandmother's 1936 Joy of Cooking edition--next time I am at the house wherein it is located enshrined, I will copy some of the more timely recipes.

I had never seen candle salad. It will haunt me.

Mormon cooking is defined in tempestoral context, what was once Mormon cooking involved two missionaries on the verdamt plains of Africa, from there to the aforeinclined candle salad, finally supercillioused by jello-o with peeled grapes in the fundament.

Terry (excuse the family but Teresa sounds so formular), I respectfully recline to you these parlays of wisdom: Do not be one of these naybunkers that would rather age against the culturalated blight, than bite a single candle salad.

So the feds come to Don and says "We wants to know where the original owner is."

and Don answers "Original owner, he wasn't no original owner. No, I'se a-leasin it to him."
Only you know how fast Don talks, so no one can ever really testify what he says, so it sounds like "Organ Donor? He wants an Organ Donor? I'se Salesian to him."

So after that his name was Don Salesian.

I don't understand how a Mormon can object to candle salad when the green edition hymn book (released in the mid-80s and which has remained a chapel staple ever since) is embossed with a nice little iconic illustration of the Tabernacle organ pipes, which resemble other organs. (It made my bishop's advice on counter-acting dirty thoughts highly impractical. He kept telling me to sing hymns and the dirty thoughts would thus be forced off the stage of my mind.)

Here's a link to the offending hymnal, btw. (Spanish version, mind you, but the English ones, which I grew up with, look identical.)

Forgive me for offering a possible reinterpretation, Kip--after all, you are the authority on your own subtext--but I would say you were standing up for the candle virgin.

By the way, I started writing this in malaprops--forget me for authoring a remandation...--and I am glad that it has already been done to death in these comments, because it would have been hard work. And even when I don't try, I often find myself skating on too stylistically thin ice and drowning in incomprehensibility. Anyway, "incline" is just too perfect an act to follow.

BTW, the recipes posted touched me to the core of my suburban self.

I think that pretty well destroys the symbolic quality, BUT we're talking about classic symbols here. When people talk about phallic symbols, they are usually speaking in Freudian terms. No amount of conscious ignorance/innocence can destroy a Freudian symbol. It has its symbolic effect regardless.

I'd like to pause to note that all the descriptions of candle salad-making I've ever heard have women and girls making them. I wonder if men ever do, or if they wait until the thing has been demolished from its initial phallic state before digging in even to eat the things.

Others might say sometimes a candle salad is just a candle salad, but I'm dubious even about Freud's famous statement: sometimes a cigar is still a phallic symbol, even if the famous psychotherapist is in deep denial!