I particularly liked "of which many blogs are a part of." It DOES make him sound like a real teen!

Ironic, that.

Thanks for reminding me to renew my membership.

P.S. Why did you leave the links intact? Seems like a waste of google mojo.

Huh? An actively political teen...as opposed to all those passively political teens? And that's a REAL teen, right? Pfui.

Also, I have to agree, that website's horrendous. Haphazard layout aside, my favorite bit is the heading "The only group combating the ACLU in all non-legal areas." Close behind, though, are the wide use of the word 'thru' in the About Us section and the lovely pyramid scheme reasoning on the front page.

I also got a laugh out of, "You may or may not know that the ACLU visits college campuses across America to recruit young impressionable minds to their evil agenda."

Overall, though, I think I'm a little too scared to look at the rest of the site.

"Main web site turn on."

"It's you!"

REAL Teen:
"How are ACLU gentlemen.
All your blog are belong to us.
ACLU are on the way to destruction.
ACLU have no chance to survive make your time.
Ha Ha Ha Ha."

(with apologies to all...)

I'm using a new browser, hadn't blocked pop-ups yet, and therefore, having clicked on the stoptheaclu.org link, I am now sharing my screen with an animated uke-playing hula doll espousing Childrens (sic) computer software cheap.

"... His background is varied which includes a degree in Biblical studies."

I presume that had an emphasis in the Old Testament.

"Hmm. I'm an American. I try to be civil (usually) to other people. I'm in favor in Liberty. And I belong to my union at work. Maybe I should join."

why old testament? what the heck did we* do?

*(the jews)

While there are a number of iffy quotes from Jesus and especially Paul in the NT, taking chunks of the OT literally and ignoring scholarly dicussions of them gives more scope for finding supposed justifications for hatred and fear.

I'm not quite sure what Eric Olsen, the site's owner, was thinking when he suddenly recruited 50 Christo-Qutbist loons. A lot of ridiculous 'Stop the ACLU blogburst' boilerplate spam postings was the result.

Do these guys do anything but project?

I don't think my brain can take it.

Hmmmm... let me see if I understand the basic premise here...

Our founding fathers really, truly wanted to found a fundamentalist evangelical xtian nation run by a theocracy, and somehow got all confused -- or were corrupted by minions of the Flying Spaghetti Monster -- during the Revolution and wrote up that pesky Bill of Rights, which is promoted at every opportunity by the evil forces of the ACLU, so we need to get rid of the ACLU in order to get rid of the Bill of Rights so that we can get back to what our Founding Fathers really truly wanted.

Is that it?

Want to read another pun on the ACLU? Click the News & Links page and scroll part way down."

I, er... no. No, I don't.

Please don't make me read the puns.

"blah blah blah blah new ACLU tv series. blah blah blah..."

So I'm thinking "the ACLU has a TV series now? Cool!"

Too bad it'll probably only be available on cable.

Oh, goody!

The story possibilities are certainly endless.

I don't know how many of them there are; "John Bambernek" and "Randy Kirk" (on Blogcritics) may or may not be sock puppets for the same guy.

However, I did get through to her it sounded like, when I said, "What about heterosexual males who rape little girls, aren't you worried about that? What's so much worse about little boys being raped than little girls being raped?"

"Gee, I never though about that," she said in that tone of voice used by people who seem to have their heads used more for hat racks that premeditated cogitation on topics outside the daily routine patterns of activity ("thought" might be too generous a term, as opposed to automatic conditioned response and procedure).

Note: Concerned Women of America is the offspring of one Bev(erly) LaHaye, wife of Tim(othy) LaHaye, yeah, -him-. One of the CWA newsletters which showed up in my mailbox had a column by her of how she had been giving up so much and had been getting discouraged spending her time in Washingon DC as a s/p/e/c/i/a/l i/n/t/e/r/e/s/t/ p/r/e/s/s/u/r/e/ g/r/o/u/p lobbyist and was away for months and months and months and month from her Family, but that then progress on her crusade suddenly started being made again and she was feeling again that it was worthwhile to be there in DC....

Yup, one of those hyporcrites, a person who stands up in public advocating a way of life for everyone else that the person themself does not follow--but justifies as being so self-abnegating and being a martyr and sacrificing their life for their values-=-which of course they are not living.

I'd expect that the Real Teen is heavily tied into one or more organizations like or affilitiated with Concerned Women of America, Eagle Forum, the Center for Military Readiness [the Schlafly protege's fake think tank which is a one note screed organization fed by federal money, bad cess to the ideologues in the government funding the screeder, founded on the idea of banning women from the US military--except as the typing pool--and from combat, etc., but somehow not caring in the -least- about the plight of civilian women caught in combat zones and hostile fire and crossfire who have been taught that the only survival skill and knowledge to be bestowed on women, is how to be a dependent on males--sounds like Taliban USA style to me...), etc.

You're a fellow FSMist? Hail, brother, in the name of His Holy Meatballs!

On a slightly more on-topic note, am I the only one who feels that the author of this e-mail should have his keyboard taken away until he has a better grasp of English grammar?

In light of reason developments, like the TV Series, which will attack the Patriot Act, the same act defending us against terror, in its first episode, we need to move as quickly as possible.

Under the Patriot Act, can I arrest and detain him indefinitely for crimes again the comma?

That's the one I particularly felt the need to diagram. Somehow the clauses felt, um, disordered. Or maybe disorderly. The last time I saw a sentence that bad that I was expected to read, it was in a "graduation writing test", in college, where I had the choice of four wrong answers to "fix" it.

I assume she's currently at liberty.

Niall McAuley followed my train of thought pretty well. I was thinking of the Left Behind authors' school of Biblical study, or perhaps the school that influenced Pat Robertson when he announced the other day that Hugo Chavez should be assassinated.

However, I'm not in any sense American.

Would they mind; would it help? Or is the USA getting to the stage where it's a valuable political point to portray your opponents as reliant on foreign lucre?

[yes, I know, http://www.liberty-human-rights.org.uk/ is a similar organisation and on my own continent; but whilst the government dislikes it, it doesn't appear to have made that kind of enemy]

Do you get the e-mail updates and newsletters from the ACLU? That's where I read about it. Forwarded it onto my mom who hasn't joined the ACLU because for years she thought you had to be a lawyer to join. (Don't ask.)

I was thinking of the Left Behind authors' school of Biblical study

I have not in fact read the books in question, but I was under the impression that they are based, to the extent that they are based on any biblical text, on Revelations, which is not in the Old Testament.

You know, the Olympics were around at the time of the Old Testament, so you could almost imagine a prohibition on nekkid discus slipping in there...

You have to be a Grand Potentate of the Fifth Circle to even know about the ACLU TV show. Getting there requires you to burn a flag, disarm a redneck, shtup a goat of the same gender, and force local schools to accept Zoroastrians as students.

And even then you won't be able to watch the show, because you need a special TV that gets Channel 1 and runs on 173 volt, 666 Hz current produced by five-bladed windmills that produce horrible screaming noises when they spin.

* * *

Um, but seriously, I haven't heard of this show either. OTOH, I routinely toss out every ACLU mailing I get, except the first one in November, which I use to mail in my annual donation.

For all I know, those tossed mailers may have everything I needed to know about this show.

Ah. I suspect the culprit is my over-eager spam filter...

There is definitely a brand of Christian fundamentalism that focuses entirely on the King James Old Testament, ignoring both Jesus and rabbinical commentary. They may just have issues with shellfish, or they may be shooting for the 'doctrinal sweet spot'.

There's a church of this persuasion in my area: the King James version is the Only Authorized Version; God is a Loving Father; the Ten Commandments are the laws you have to follow; you have to Accept Jesus as Your Personal Lord and Savior. (caps mine, but it's their emphasis)

Failure to go along with these in any way means you get to spend eternity someplace very warm. (Never mind salvation by faith, or doing good works: these people are for direct, personal salvation only.)

That there are some contradictions involved doesn't seem to slow them down.

What, the Grand Caymans?

You mean like in 21st Century Fox?

The ACLU is the first line of defense, the NRA the second line. :)

"Yes, I'd give the Devil benefit of law, for my own safety's sake!"

Using Whois, I looked up who owns the domain. It's a real estate agent named Dale A r c h d e k i n in Kansas. Nothing much about him on the net, but there's a lot of odd nutcases out there.

That's the owner of the stoptheaclu dot com domain. This person also owns the dot net. The dot org domain, also mentioned, is owned by one N e d d K a r e i v a of Chicago, who has left a much wider footprint. You can learn his opinions about gambling in Illinois, Terri Schiavo, mandatory seatbelt laws, and Scrabble tournaments with a little googling. (I don't mean to imply that he's an odd nutcase.)

(Any chance the Moderator can fix this?)

[Done. -- JDM]

Boy, does that look like an alias. Though given the quality (quantity?) of nutcase-ism present in the original missive, it may well be a personal choice as ratified by a local judge.

why old testament? what the heck did we* do?

Remember all the stuff about begating and smiting? You* failed to retain the services of a qualified editor. Wilfully, it would appear.

* the jews**

** in the lightest, most general sense possible

Where do I get one? Are the horrible screaming noises the moans of the damned, or merely the sound of Dominionists trying to think critically?

I do need to toss the ACLU a few more bucks - they lost track of me during my recent nomadic ways and have yet to triangulate on my new digs in the Emerald City. Or Jet City. Or Rain City. (The body politic seems to have commitment issues w/r/t nicknames up here.)

(With apologies to Fred, who said it first.)

You know those big, loud, dumb movies where, when they want a scene to seem extra dramatic and portentous, they have people chanting in Latin along with the music? I figure it would sound like that, except the chanters would be dancing on hot coals.

i definitely own to displaying that part of my heritage/education from time to time, perhaps not now, but if i was really in the mood (i am not currently in the mood because i just had a few misadventures trying to fry frozen pierogies, also my right knee is suddenly gone all wonky), i'm sure i could bang out a doozy for you, through all the smoke.

It's like one of those logic puzzles James T. Kirk used to blow up mainframes with: does not compute.

I suspect Making Light may have enough blog weight to boost their Google rank noticeably, which is probably all they were after in the first place; given that, they don't care if you think they're a pack of morons. As Oscar Wilde said (at least in Monty Python) "The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about."

Ah, but he's not a "real" teen, he's a "REAL teen". All the difference in the world. I'm sure.

Republican
Evangelical
All-American
Liberty-Loving

Or perhaps it is a list of virtuous avatars . . .

The Steadfastness of *R*ush
The Life-Lovingness of *E*ric Rudolph
The Crusaderfullness of *A*nn Coulter
The Orneryness of Trent *L*ott

. . . and when Young Republican paperboy Justin Batson says the word formed by their names out loud he becomes. . .

. . . another damn chickenhawk!

I also thought REAL might well be an acronym in which R=Republican, but I hadn't come up with possibilities for the rest of it. Yours seems quite likely, if it is an acronym.

Maybe it stands for "Registered-as-a-concientious-
objector-just-in-case."

Republican

it's been awhile since i made pierogies from scratch, so i don't remember what my recipe says, but these pierogies-in-a-box said specifically not to deep fry them.

"Throughout this conversation, Rios was clearly eager to join in. And as soon as there was a pause in the discussion, she did. ‘’You know,'’ she said, ‘’the truth is, Christians do want to convert Jews.'’

Eckstein and Mamo exchanged glances. ‘’Not by some bait-and-switch trick,'’ she said. ‘’But we believe it’s part of God’s plan.'’ Eckstein winced the way he had when Pastor Munsey called him a born-again Christian.

‘’Anyway,'’ Rios said, ‘’we love Jews, notwithstanding their rudeness and hatred for us.'’"

Eckstein canned her just about immediately I'd say.

Served with saurkraut on the side, of course.

Nice to see that Jeff Gannon found himself a new job.

Tom (Womack): the problem with Liberty (formerly the National Council for Civil Liberties) here in the UK is that about twenty years ago the organization was hijacked for use as a career ladder by a group of very bright proto-Blairistas, many of whom subsequently made it into parliament and even junior ministerial positions. It is the kiss of death for a campaigning civil liberties organization to operate a revolving door with a party of government: prior to 1997 the damage wasn't obvious on the outside, but when the NCCL's national executive came out supporting the illiberal agenda of Jack Straw when he was Home Secretary, the writing was on the wall.

(There's a lesson here for American supporters of the ACLU -- do not allow your organization to become aligned with the Democrats, now matter how tempting the short-term bemefits may seem, because if the Democrats end up as the party of government again the ACLU will become seen as a convenient promotion ladder for activists at the expense of its ability to criticize the governing party.)

If you want to do something useful in the UK, a good start might be to look at Danny O'Brien's goal of setting up a British equivalent of the EFF. Then work outward from there.

The old Mrs. T's said you had to boil them first for anything.

While I fry them I mash some avocado, mix in a bit of salt, and use that as a dip.

Ha-ha! Having been pretty involved with the ACLU here in Hawaii, I think I can assure you that the Democratic Party will not touch the ACLU with a ten-foot pole. They might wave said pole threateningly at us, to prove they are "middle-of-the-road" and not affiliated with dangerous un-American concepts such as liberty. After all, this is the country where a presidential candidate could be denounced as "a card-carrying member of the ACLU."

Mainly though, I would say the Democrats, like the Republicans, just don't get the whole idea. Rights? U.S. Constitution? [blank stare] You mean the ACLU is not a government agency of some kind? [dazed confusion]

I know the guy whose idea it was. He was objecting to the way certain Christian homophobes selectively used Leviticus to bolster their hatred, and photoshopped a photo of a guy with a "God Hates Fags" into "God Hates Shrimp." A friend of his created the website, including the wicked bumper stickers. (My favorite: "When Jesus Died, He was wearing a crown of thorns, not a lobster bib")

I'm not sure whether this counts as spam (his name links to stoptheaclu.com) or just utterly, utterly clueless.

I can tell you that is not an alias. I am his son. I am an artist/designer living on the east coast, in a city, with artist/designer friends some gay some not. Most of us have not seen the inside of a church since the last wedding we attended. Everyone I know voted against the current president, and a lot of us said we were moving to Canada after the results (that never happened though)
Sadly folks, he believes all of those things found on that site. It is truly amazing, people with that type of mentality honestly see things differently. I have noticed this fundamental difference between he and I on a number of occasions. Something trivial can happen,and his perception of that event will be the polar opposite of my own. All family grievences aside, those thoughts and feelings he expresses on that site are unfortunatly true to his person. The REALLY scary part is there are millions of americans who agree.
Just my $.02
Dale (III)