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March 18, 2003

Rough Justice
Posted by Teresa at 10:14 PM *

From Adam Felber’s Rough Justice IV: The Movie Inside President Bush’s Head:

ANNAN: I’m taking you off the case.

BUSH (leaping up): You can’t do that!

ANNAN: Yes, I can. Sort of. Officially, at least. Dammit, Bush, you can’t just storm in and kill an important man like Hussein. There are laws. We need proof.

BUSH: You need proof, Chief. I just need my investigatative partners.

ANNAN: Partners? Your partners have already requested reassignment.

BUSH (with a flourish): I’m talking about the only partners I ever needed - Smith and Crisco.

ANNAN: “Crisco?”

BUSH: Uh, “Wesson.” Smith and Wesson.

ANNAN: Don’t make me ask for your badge, Bush.

BUSH: You don’t have the balls, Annan. This is between me and Hussein now. Me and the man who killed my father.

ANNAN: Bush, he didn’t kill your father!

BUSH: Yeah, that’s what Dad says, too, but he’s just trying to protect me. Listen Chief, you get the word out to Mr. Hussein that he’s got 48 hours to turn himself in. After that, tell ‘im I’m coming for him. And he’s going to have to face some… [turns to camera] Rough Justice.
Normally I’m put off by self-described comedians, but Adam Felber meets the basic criterion: He’s funny.
Comments on Rough Justice:
#1 ::: Sylvia Li ::: (view all by) ::: March 18, 2003, 11:25 PM:

Oh marvellous. Into the permanent bookmark list.

Someone who can make me laugh out loud today is a treasure beyond price.

#2 ::: Paul Riddell ::: (view all by) ::: March 19, 2003, 11:15 AM:

But...but...but I thought that the movie in Bush's head was "Dick and Dubya Do America". Either that, or "They Saved Nixon's Brain".

#3 ::: Stefan Jones ::: (view all by) ::: March 19, 2003, 12:16 PM:

I don't buy it. I picture the movie in Bush's head as being a cheap Apocalypse-flavored techno-thriller. The kind shown in second-run theaters for a week, church basements for a month, then goes to VHS, where it's sold at gun shows and touted on the 700 Club.

#4 ::: Brian Newhouse ::: (view all by) ::: March 20, 2003, 09:05 AM:

No, it's definitely the "Rough Justice" kind of modern-dress-&-urban-setting vengeance-cum-town-tamer Western--just the kind of movie that's just about the only kind any self-respecting Beltway pundit takes seriously.

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