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April 19, 2003

Further religious tat
Posted by Teresa at 09:34 AM *

The best ones always leave me speechless. Just go look.

But wait! There’s more.

(via Boing Boing)

Comments on Further religious tat:
#1 ::: Chad Orzel ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 10:29 AM:

The disclaimer that "This Ticket is not meant to mock or replace the need or desire to practice a given religion or faith" almost makes it sound like parody religious tat. It's a testament to the humor-deficiency of most of the people that make this crap that I'm really not sure one way or the other...

#2 ::: Trey ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 11:24 AM:

That is absolutely disgusting. Thanks for sharing. :)

#4 ::: E.M.M. ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 12:39 PM:

To me the disclaimer says,"Why no, we're not selling indulgances."

#5 ::: Emma ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 12:50 PM:

Teresa,
do you have a standard google search for these things? I want to make sure I never use that particular word combination!
EEEK!

#6 ::: Lisa ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 12:53 PM:

Ah yes, the joys of indulgentia a culpa et a poena have finally been admitted to the Protestant arsenal.

If only Chaucer were alive today . . .

#8 ::: JS ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 02:46 PM:

Prove you are saved for only $19.95 - I don't know why they didn't lead with that. I mean, this whole 'international registry' thing, that sounds suspicious to me... mark of the beast?

#9 ::: Xopher ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 02:57 PM:

What. are. they. thinking?

I mean the people who buy this crap (assuming anyone does). The people who sell it are obviously thinking "here's a way to make a buck off stooopid people."

#10 ::: Fred Boness ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 03:46 PM:

Something big coming in June or sometime maybe...

http://www.freeticket2heaven.com/

#11 ::: Ter ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 03:59 PM:

So, with that Stairway to Heaven do you no longer need a Ticket To Ride?

#12 ::: Ian Osmond ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 04:20 PM:

Wow, that's almost as good as the glittery lighter my mother has that says, "Angle of Mercy, Protect Me." When she saw it, she didn't even notice the typo -- she just bought it because she loves tacky religious crap, but we all agree that the "Angle Of Mercy" bit just makes it.

Mom's been known to use this lighter to light Shabbat candles. Because, y'know, it's a way to welcome the Angles of Shabbat. Which, we figure, are about 34.23 degrees and 140.2 degrees.

#13 ::: Abby ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 05:55 PM:

*ROTFL at the angles!*

That is. Yes. That's ... marvelous, in a really distressing sort of way.

As a craft-dabbler and the daughter of a craft-dabbler, all I can say is: I could make one just as nice for 50 cents.

#14 ::: Jon H ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 07:27 PM:

Damn. Too bad I didn't think of that first.

I suppose there's still an opening for a "Ticket to Hell".

#15 ::: Steve Taylor ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 09:03 PM:

> Damn. Too bad I didn't think of that first.

> I suppose there's still an opening for a
> "Ticket to Hell".

My thoughts exactly , but no - the url is taken. Gotta move fast these days.

And there's probably no real market for ticket2purgatory.com

#17 ::: Bill Humphries ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 09:16 PM:

Oh bloody hell, I screwed up the markup in that comment.
Where's my "Get Out of Parser Error Free" card?

#18 ::: John M. Ford ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 10:14 PM:

Given my degree of apostasy, I don't think a ticket will do it. Do they have Commuter Flash Passes?

#19 ::: Xopher ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 10:59 PM:

Ian, that's wonderful. Also, it explains some of the weirder trig functions that have puzzled me since high school; now I finally know what they're for.

They're for Arc-angles, of course.

#20 ::: Lois Fundis ::: (view all by) ::: April 19, 2003, 11:29 PM:

Ter said, "So, with that Stairway to Heaven do you no longer need a Ticket To Ride?"

Graham Parker, "The Up Escalator"

#21 ::: Bruce Arthurs ::: (view all by) ::: April 20, 2003, 04:44 PM:

I get a "The Page Cannot Be Displayed" message on both links.

Perhaps they're closed for Easter?

#22 ::: Dorothy Rothschild ::: (view all by) ::: April 20, 2003, 05:53 PM:

Yeah, I'm getting 'dunno what page you're looking for but we can't find it' messages too.

I once saw a very badly done copy of Hamlet in which Horatio mourned, 'and flights of angles sing thee to thy rest.' The mathematicians down the hall loved it, but the rest of the English department was sceptical.

#23 ::: John M. Ford ::: (view all by) ::: April 20, 2003, 10:58 PM:

". . . flights of Angles sing thee to thy rest."
"Mr. Horatio, sir, the guys on the battlements report Saxon paratroops."

#24 ::: gmoses ::: (view all by) ::: April 20, 2003, 11:56 PM:

"...that your name is a registered holder of a ticket to heaven and has made a commitment...that ultimately rewards me with a place in heaven"

Blasphemous AND illiterate!

#25 ::: Kate Worley ::: (view all by) ::: April 21, 2003, 01:06 AM:

If that Rapture thing comes earlier than 4 to 6 weeks, will your PayPal receipt get you through?

#26 ::: Martin Luther ::: (view all by) ::: April 21, 2003, 06:03 AM:

This really upsets me.

#27 ::: Richard Brandt ::: (view all by) ::: April 21, 2003, 11:08 AM:

You know, when I sell on eBay the standard domestic shipping and handling is only $4.00, and even Priority Mail costs me less than that. Shucks, Global Priority is only $9.00, not $9.95. But I guess salvation is extra.

#28 ::: Bill Humphries ::: (view all by) ::: April 21, 2003, 01:58 PM:

Martin: you're one to be complaining. Besides, you're dead, and that other guy gets to reanimate on Easter Sunday. :) <-- big, pointy, tounge in cheek indicator.

#29 ::: Stefan Jones ::: (view all by) ::: April 21, 2003, 03:03 PM:

"If that Rapture thing comes earlier than 4 to 6 weeks, will your PayPal receipt get you through?"

Only if you ordered an e-ticket to heaven and have proper ID.

* * *

The whole ticket to heaven deal is really old. Turn of the last century, even. Evengelists sold maps and timetables of railway lines (curvey ones with stations like Drunkard and Envy, straight ones with stations like Chastity and with a big cross at the end) and tickets as well.

#30 ::: Alan Bostick ::: (view all by) ::: April 22, 2003, 01:28 PM:

John M. Ford: The flash passes would be for people expecting to use it more than once. Hindus, for example.

#31 ::: Mary Kay ::: (view all by) ::: April 22, 2003, 05:57 PM:

Teresa: I can see how you'd be speechless. Projectile vomiting does that to a person. Well, ok, not really; but I did distinctly feel my gorge rise and if I'd eaten anything yet...

MKK

#32 ::: Jim Shiloh ::: (view all by) ::: April 22, 2003, 07:53 PM:

It's a rip off. I'll sell anyone a ticket for $5.00, and throw in the shipping. And $8.00 will buy you a ticket annointed with a dab of Crisco (while supply lasts).

#33 ::: Emmet ::: (view all by) ::: April 23, 2003, 02:33 PM:

I am reminded of Gregory the Great, who walked into a square in Rome and said "Ey up, lads, we've got some right Angles here."

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