Back to previous post: Not bored, but Libored

Go to Making Light's front page.

Forward to next post: Hey, hey, it’s the Fourth of July

Subscribe (via RSS) to this post's comment thread. (What does this mean? Here's a quick introduction.)

July 4, 2012

Happy Independence Day!
Posted by Jim Macdonald at 01:02 AM * 7 comments

Q. What has feathers, webbed feet, and certain inalienable rights?
A. The Ducklaration of Independence.

Q. What has four legs, a shiny nose, and fought for England?
A. Rudolph the Redcoat Reindeer.

Q. What did the American flag say to the British flag?
A. Nothing. It just waved.

Q. Why did Paul Revere ride his horse from Boston to Lexington?
A. Because his horse was too heavy to carry.

Q. Why did King George think the Declaration of Independence was a joke?
A. It was written in Punsylvania.

Q. Why did George Washington chop down a cherry tree with his hatchet?
A. The chainsaw hadn’t been invented.

Q. Do they have a Fourth of July in England?
A. Yes, between the third and the fifth.

Comments on Happy Independence Day!:
#1 ::: David Wald ::: (view all by) ::: July 04, 2012, 10:45 AM:
Q. Do they have a Fourth of July in England?

An English friend once told me that they called it "Thanksgiving".

#2 ::: Madeleine Robins ::: (view all by) ::: July 04, 2012, 02:14 PM:

Best 4th of July I ever spent was in England in 1976. Fireworks, a concert on Hampstead Heath, and the British people around me sort of pleased about the whole thing. As one woman said to me when she realized (because I opened my mouth and said something) that I was American, "Well, that worked out rather nicely, didn't it?"

#3 ::: Serge Broom ::: (view all by) ::: July 04, 2012, 02:16 PM:

It did, didn't it, Madeleine?

#4 ::: Serge Broom ::: (view all by) ::: July 04, 2012, 03:35 PM:

Benedict Arnold, aka the Bad Guy in the whole affair, was an ancestor of my wife who lost a foot in my hometown of Quebec City the decade before. Benny did, not my wife.

#5 ::: Jim Macdonald ::: (view all by) ::: July 04, 2012, 03:50 PM:

Q. Who had feathers, a flat bill, and tried to turn over West Point to the British?

A. Beneduck Arnold.

#6 ::: P J Evans ::: (view all by) ::: July 04, 2012, 04:03 PM:

4
And his father was known for his drinking. (Benny should have a connection to Dysfunctional Family Day.)

#7 ::: David DeLaney ::: (view all by) ::: July 15, 2012, 05:29 AM:

Gladly, the cross-eyed bear, has a brother - Hardly, a man...

--Dave, the eighteenth of April after inflation is the fourth of July, right?

Welcome to Making Light's comment section. The moderators are Avram Grumer, Jim Macdonald, Teresa & Patrick Nielsen Hayden, and Abi Sutherland. Abi is the moderator most frequently onsite. She's also the kindest. Teresa is the theoretician. Are you feeling lucky?

If you are a spammer, your fate is in the hands of Jim Macdonald, and your foot shall slide in due time.

Comments containing more than seven URLs will be held for approval. If you want to comment on a thread that's been closed, please post to the most recent "Open Thread" discussion.

You can subscribe (via RSS) to this particular comment thread. (If this option is baffling, here's a quick introduction.)

Post a comment.
(Real e-mail addresses and URLs only, please.)

HTML Tags:
<strong>Strong</strong> = Strong
<em>Emphasized</em> = Emphasized
<a href="http://www.url.com">Linked text</a> = Linked text

Spelling reference:
Tolkien. Minuscule. Gandhi. Millennium. Delany. Embarrassment. Publishers Weekly. Occurrence. Asimov. Weird. Connoisseur. Accommodate. Hierarchy. Deity. Etiquette. Pharaoh. Teresa. Its. Macdonald. Nielsen Hayden. It's. Fluorosphere. Barack. More here.















(You must preview before posting.)

Dire legal notice
Making Light copyright 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014 by Patrick & Teresa Nielsen Hayden. All rights reserved.