In "When Hitler Stole Pink Rabbit" by Judith Kerr, Swiss boys throw gravel and shoes at Anna to show that they love her. Anna, mark you, is not impressed.
Just as a counterexample.
Quoting abi in 212 who was quoting - "As Nowhere Man quite cogently observes in 203, part of the whole equation isn't necessarily how badly you were treated, but how well you coped with it."
Some of that has to do with other advantages one was given. For example, I had a solid grounding of love and security from babyhood, which meant that I had a self built up before the personalised abuse started when I was 4. The abuse was, objectively and subjectively, horrific -- but when I was extracted from the situation and fed with the things little humans need, like attention, acceptance, trust etc, I had enough of that secure infant self still buried in me to build an adulthood on.
Doing it without that would have been much, much harder.
Homeschooling / Home education - I'm doing it to protect my children from the destructive and isolating system of institutionalised education.
And yes, it takes a lot more effort in re their social lives, because I have to accept and exercise my responsibility for the health of their relationships. I can't leave it to teachers to notice and mitigate damaging relationships.
I think it's worth it. My mother's jealous that I am able to give this to my children; the home in which she had to raise her children was not safe enough and so we had to go to school, which was not a good way to get an education, for us. Though it was an excellent way to learn to pass exams.
@89 Arachne Jericho: Re: Forgiveness: I think I will never forgive my father for persuading me that my mother could never love me. Or for denying her medical care so she spent five years bedridden by depression. Even though I've been secure and confident in her love for far longer than I thought I'd lost it...
I'm celebrating by never, ever letting my father come anywhere near my daughters.
I do it a lot.
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