Thel: there are a couple of native plants in the Northwest that look similar to giant hogweed and can grow up to 4-6 feet. Wild parsnip, which is safe to eat; water hemlock, which is poisonous (but only if you actually eat it, unlike giant hogweed).
Lenore: thanks. "Hogweed" just took me by surprise-- it was hiding in a collection of normal mystery stories...
"The security of a castle rests on ye eyeballs of its sentries." Curse of the Giant Hogweed
I don't remember the author...
So have I. In an ideal world, Olen and Tessy would have had a clear understanding up front that the family was not to be gossiped about (in any medium; I realize Tessy didn't have the blog when she started). If Tessy found that unacceptable, she could have chosen not to take the job.
I'm wondering if the sort of standard non-disclosure agreement that eg. software companies use would be applicable and enforceable to this sort of situation?
Are people considering that there's a trust issue from Olen's point of view too? I'm not defending her behavior, it's atrocious (particularly the continued slander and character assassination). But frankly I'd be pretty f***ing upset if I found out someone had posted details of my personal life on their blog without my knowledge or permission.
"we're drifting en masse into the "shame on her for being so stupid as to tell the employer""
I guess the point I was trying to make was that I _don't_ think it was necessarily stupid. There are a couple of good arguments in favor of doing what she did.
James: why not? It worked, didn't it? :) And he took some political heat for the murder, but not near enough to bring him down.
...And I wouldn't rely too heavily on a word-for-word recollection of a conversation that took place some considerable time in the past, and whose consequences were emotionally charged. Even the most unimpeachable witness (which people don't seem to consider Ms Olen) might be considered unreliable under such circumstances.
"Someone with a degree in English, who's going to grad school for an advanced degree -- is a member of Olen's social class already."
Depends on your perception of class. Actually it depends on Olen's perception of class.
Olen might have felt Tessy was of a lower class because (a) she wasn't wealthy (b) she didn't own a NY home (c) she was looking for a nanny job (d) other imponderables having to do with family background, not having gone to the Right College, etc. The point is that it's fairly clear Olen felt superior.
Laura: I'm not claiming it makes sense or there's any logical reason behind it. I'm saying it's an emotional reaction that many people have and that doesn't necessarily yield to rational argument. Especially when yoked in tandem with all the other issues that seem to be going on in this situation.
Your point about class and sex is well taken.
OK, I said it was "possible" Olen might have found the blog, not "probable"... I hadn't realized that there was so little identifying detail on it.
But it's also possible Tessy might have felt she should tell her employer(s-- I agree Mr. Olen is strangely absent from this whole scenario) that she was writing about them. Ie. as she became closer to the family, she may have felt bad about talking about them behind their backs, and decided honesty was the best policy.
"just about anybody who takes care of kids also has a sex life. We just pretend they don't."
True. I'm not claiming Ms. Olen's reaction was at all logical or reasonable-- just pointing out some of the additional emotional fuel on her fire.
Kathryn brought up another point I had been thinking about-- everyone's been agreeing it was foolish for the nanny to tell her employer about her blog. But it's entirely possible Ms. Olen might have eventually discovered the blog on her own (though she is probably not as net-savvy as you, K.) Doesn't that cast a different light on the alleged foolishness?
Sean wrote: "This delusion that employees are actually pals is interesting to me."
I see that a lot used to justify sub-standard working conditions, below-minimum wages, etc. "Oh, we're family here, you don't need a union!"
Not to defend Ms. Olen, but I see a couple of extra factors at work in her behavior: 1. The fact that this is someone who's taking care of her children probably makes her extra touchy regarding sex issues: she might be a bit more reasonable about the sexuality of, say, a housekeeper. (Or not.) 2. Likely she feels guilty about not having the time to take care of her kids herself, and likely the guilt is unacknowledged, so she takes it out on the nannies. 3. She may just be really uncomfortable with having some complete stranger suddenly become an intimate part of the household-- I know that would bother me-- so she tried to defuse that feeling by creating a "friendship" relationship. Not a good idea in the long run, and again, probably largely unconscious.
How about a villanelle?
There's 30 million dollars in my bank.
I am a widow, under house arrest.
Take 10 percent with all my grateful thanks.
Before our family fortunes cruelly sank,
My husband was a general, powerful, the best.
There's 30 million dollars in my bank.
My son's arrested. They will make him walk the plank.
I assure you this is truth and not a jest.
Take 10 percent with all my grateful thanks.
My daughter left, 'fore all the loopholes shrank
She'll come to meet you, whene'er we think is best.
There's 30 million dollars in my bank.
Your account number here___ Fill in the blank.
The money I will transfer, egg to nest.
Take 10 percent with all my grateful thanks.
You may think that I am crook or crank,
But heed the family Abacha's sincere request!
There's 30 million dollars in my bank.
Take 10 percent with all my grateful thanks.
Hmmm... anyone remember Bakshi's "Cool World" and the "spike of power"?
I try not to read semiotic meaningfulness into every random bit of architecture that goes past... but sometimes they just rub your nose in it.
| Year | Number of comments posted |
|---|---|
| 2005 | 17 |
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