Back to previous post: Outrageous Recipes

Go to Making Light's front page.

Forward to next post: Army of one

Subscribe (via RSS) to this post's comment thread. (What does this mean? Here's a quick introduction.)

August 14, 2003

Beer in the bathtub
Posted by Teresa at 07:54 AM *

I posted a longish comment over at Snapping Links about how to run a small conference, if anyone here is interested. For many of you, the technology’s going to sound awfully familiar.

[Recipe Index]

Comments on Beer in the bathtub:
#1 ::: ralph ::: (view all by) ::: August 14, 2003, 11:11 AM:

I would recommend not placing the beer in the bathtub, particularly if you're buying kegs. Kegs are heavy, and if you drop one, it may break the bathtub, which are typically made of fiberglass. Much better to get the beer distributor to rent you a tin tub to hold the keg, which you can fill with ice to keep the keg cold. (Yes, this did happen one year at our shortwave radio conference....)

#2 ::: Jeremy Leader ::: (view all by) ::: August 14, 2003, 02:27 PM:

Teresa, is that link correct? I'm getting " could not be found" errors.

#3 ::: Tom Whitmore ::: (view all by) ::: August 14, 2003, 04:00 PM:

Um -- bathtubs are designed to hold a certain amount of water. Ice floats in water, as do most cans of soda and beer. Therefore, filling the tub with items which are less dense than what they're designed for shouldn't overload them.

Kegs are indeed another matter. They extend higher than the tub, and therefore may well exceed its weight bearing capacity.

Scratching the tub is another issue -- cheap shower curtain liners laid down before adding ice and sodas is a good idea, particularly in a hotel.

Oddly enough I've been having a very similar discussion with a person from Canada off the SMOFS list.


#4 ::: John M. Ford ::: (view all by) ::: August 14, 2003, 06:01 PM:

Obviously the world needs BEER: AN OPERATOR'S MANUAL. PoD technology, obviously, and two editions: a $10 softcover for interested amateurs, and a Professional Convention Organizer's Edition, in several custom 3-ring binders (with rack) for $5000, which includes one year of field updates but only a single-user license -- distributed beer mechanics requiring a network license and a consultant's fee.


#5 ::: CHip ::: (view all by) ::: August 14, 2003, 09:39 PM:

Mike -- Davey tells me that nobody can afford $5000 these days, so the pro edition would be bootlegged as soon as it came out. "That's the Microsoft edition; beer should be free for all!" (I can't imagine Stallman getting drunk, no matter how much it would improve him.)

#6 ::: ala ::: (view all by) ::: August 14, 2003, 10:50 PM:

I always think that the most wonderful thing for enjoying is to drink Munich beer and degust Berliner sausage.(Better in a riproarious bar with friends watching basketball games)

mmmmmmmm i love that

#7 ::: Elaine (epersonae) ::: (view all by) ::: August 15, 2003, 12:10 AM:

I was broken earlier, now I'm better. (dunno what happened, as it seemed to come on all of a sudden this afternoon, and was okay later...something to do with the power outage?)

I'm not for beer too much myself, more of a hard cider gal.

#8 ::: John M. Ford ::: (view all by) ::: August 15, 2003, 01:20 AM:

Chip -- well, of course; what else would one do with a book on alcoholic beverages than bootleg it?

"A sign above the bar read ONLY GENUINE RELIABLE MICROSOFT PRODUCTS SERVICED AND MAINTAINED HERE. I was trying to count the number of inoperative statements in those few words . . ."
-- The Continental Sysop

A few years back there was a list of OS Beers; one example was Windows Beer, which comes in a 32-ounce can but contains only 16 ounces of brew. The full list surely must be Out There in Webland Somewhere.

#9 ::: Seth Ellis ::: (view all by) ::: August 15, 2003, 07:32 AM:

And here it is.

#10 ::: Kip W ::: (view all by) ::: August 15, 2003, 08:27 AM:

beer should be free for all!

"Beer wants to be pee."

#11 ::: Teresa Nielsen Hayden ::: (view all by) ::: August 17, 2003, 02:51 PM:

I was writing a comment to this thread when the lights went out. Gist: cans and bottles, not kegs. And don't let any soaked-off labels go down the drain.

I remember that I was trying to reconstruct the percentages for beer and soda that we use when we're buying supplies for a Tor party. Right now they seem harder to remember.


4 parts caffeinated brown soda
3 parts lemon-lime soda
2 parts diet caffeinated brown soda
2 parts orange/root beer/ginger ale
2 parts flavored selzer and/or diet lemon-lime
4 parts decent ale (Sam Adams always works)
2 parts IPA and/or Bitter
2 parts Corona, Rolling Rock, Dos Equis, Bras d'Or, etc.
2 parts darker, heavier ales and stouts
2 parts hard cider (Granny Smith goes over well)
The Pizza Algorithm (as evolved from slush-killing sessions):
At least half of the pizza you order must be pepperoni and cheese, with no other toppings.

Order one-half to one-third that many pies with sausage topping. One other non-exotic topping may be added to each sausage-topped pie.

The pie that most commonly remains when everybody's grabbed their first one or two slices is the all-cheese. Next most common is the white (ricotta) pie. Third most common is the vegetables-only. Keep this in mind.

Remember to ask for oregano, red pepper flakes, and garlic powder on the side.

Bear in mind that many people who don't like bell peppers really don't like bell peppers, and exercise prudence accordingly.

No anchovies for group pizza sessions. Just don't do it.

Watch out for the whiner(s) who has non-specific reservations about all the suggested toppings. He or she will often turn out to be a voracious pizza-eater who'll chow down on all the most attractive pies, even if they're topped with the exact list of items the whiner most disapproved of during the ordering phase.

Some vegetarians experience a miraculous conversion on the spot, if the pepperoni smells good enough.

#12 ::: Tom Whitmore ::: (view all by) ::: August 17, 2003, 03:22 PM:

Comment on the cider -- buying Hornsby's is the equivalent of buying Miller Light. I could do a personal ranking of cider faves, but that would be only a personal ranking. I was astonished to find an 8% alcohol local cider whilst in York for SMOFCon, at Maltings -- tasted a lot like tbe best of my homebrews. Gives me heart for brewing more, that does.


#13 ::: Xopher ::: (view all by) ::: August 17, 2003, 03:48 PM:

Teresa - at least for me, your last pizza rule is true, but only because the qualifier is always I the only vegetarian out there that finds the smell of pepperoni repellent, even sickening?

Maybe it's because I accidentally ate something that had tiny bits of prosciutto mixed in with the identical-looking tiny bits of tomato a few years ago, and spent the next 45 minutes vomiting my guts out, and the next 24 hours feeling queasy and weak (not to mention geas-ridden).

No, that's not a typo.

#14 ::: Teresa Nielsen Hayden ::: (view all by) ::: August 17, 2003, 04:24 PM:

Of course it's not a typo. Jeez, what do you take me for?

Tom, I go by which bottles get left sitting around half-full during Tor parties. You can pick up a lot of useful information when you're doing cleanup.

#15 ::: Teresa Nielsen Hayden ::: (view all by) ::: August 17, 2003, 04:26 PM:

Hmmm. Make that "1 part flavored selzer and/or diet lemon-lime".

#16 ::: Kate Nepveu ::: (view all by) ::: August 17, 2003, 10:09 PM:

One of the many reasons Tor parties are so lovely is the cider.

Bear in mind that many people who don't like bell peppers really don't like bell peppers, and exercise prudence accordingly.

Someone on raseff called it cooties--bell peppers have taste cooties, they contaminate the whole dish and physically taking out the pieces is futile.

#17 ::: Teresa Nielsen Hayden ::: (view all by) ::: August 18, 2003, 12:02 AM:

I hadn't heard the phrase, but I like it. I feel that way about liver: a small amount renders the whole inedible.

#18 ::: Kate Nepveu ::: (view all by) ::: August 18, 2003, 01:04 AM:


Ah. Here's the original post, on Google, about food cooties by Eloise Beltz-Decker.

#19 ::: John M. Ford ::: (view all by) ::: August 18, 2003, 01:51 AM:

Know ye not that a little liver livereth the -- uh, excuse me, I seem to have left the pizza boiling.

#20 ::: Jeremy Leader ::: (view all by) ::: August 18, 2003, 01:23 PM:

Funny thing, bell peppers make my wife ill, but she likes the flavor they give (in some dishes). So she sometimes uses them in cooking, but only in large, easily removed chunks.

In college, a group of a dozen or so students and faculty went out for pizza and beer after a rock-climbing trip, and we made the mistake of letting a fellow with a rather twisted (and sometimes annoying) sense of humor order the pizzas. The big surprise was that everyone present was completely satisfied by the pizzas he ordered: ham and pineapple on one, and anchovies on another. In retrospect, perhaps hunger played a larger part than serendipity, though.

Smaller type (our default)
Larger type
Even larger type, with serifs

Dire legal notice
Making Light copyright 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017 by Patrick & Teresa Nielsen Hayden. All rights reserved.